life-to-life

This morning I woke up and realized that was a heavy rain outside. I walked to the balcony and stood there for awhile. Then I talked to myself: “OK! It is fine. It is raining now and outside is too wet for me to go out. I better stay back at home.” Actually I was trying to give myself a good excuse not going to gym.

What a lazy man here. Haha…

Then, I made a cup of hot Vico for myself. Lie down on a chair and started reading a magazine. Inside the magazine has a few interesting statements. Here there are...

“… am I doing what I’m supposed to be doing, am I who I’m supposed to be?”

Have you come across this kind of question before? What is your answer? For me, I really cannot answer this question due to my blank mind.

“… if you know a loved one is going to die, besides spending time with them, is to be sure that you say everything that needs to be said. If you wanna say I forgive you, I love you, or let’s forget about what’s happened between us, say it now, get it done now and make peace.”

Yes, I used to practice this in my daily life. This is because I don’t know whether tomorrow or the next hour is I still exist? That’s why I am always treasure the time that I have and cherish all the things that surrounding me in every moment.

“… if you spend time with people, and share and give of yourself, then when you’re gone, you’re not totally gone. You live on inside the heads and the hearts of everybody you’ve touched.”

This is true. That’s why we always miss and remember somebody’s has already gone.

“… if you take the truth of most faiths, purely practiced, they’re really not that dissimilar. There’s a belief in something bigger than you, a belief in helping people who are lesser off than you, and a belief in treating people the way you want to be treated. It’s all pretty much the same.”

I agreed. Respecting, understanding and helping each other are what humanism is. This is how peace created. This is what we supposed to do in our daily live.

Before I end my sharing today, I would like to share the follows Ikeda sensei’s guidance.

“We live in an age where opportunities for profound life-to-life inspiration are all but nonexistent. Idle amusements bring only fleeting pleasure. They produce neither profound inspiration nor growth for one's life. By contrast, Buddhism exists to enable people to realize personal growth and to improve their lives. Buddhism is always rooted in the reality of life. It is the wellspring of wisdom for bringing harmony and happiness to our families, local communities and society at large.”

职业倾向

I found that is a right time for me to attend the “Talent Development” training course, which was organized by my company. Actually, this kind of training course needs to practice from time to time. As we know that people tend to change from time to time. Today our need might not same as after few months.

One day before sit in the training, we were advised to complete our prework, which was answered all the 42 pages questionnaires. I was burning the overnight lamps in the hotel and finished the prework at 1.30am. :P

Although this one day training was a bit rush for us, but so far we have covered the following topics. There were TOP (talent, organization and passion), Career Best, Distinctiveness; Career Orientations; Four Stages of Contribution. Throughout this training I was getting to know myself more.

I was impressed by one of the topic, there was a Career Orientations. Based on the questionnaires result dated as 22/6, I have 2 dominants, there were Balance and Challenge. According to the facilitator, he advised me to look into it seriously and think carefully which one wills more close to me. Due to these two are conflicts among themselves. Seem like I have double characters. Haha… That’s why this afternoon, I tried the questionnaires again. It came out with a different result, but I surprised that no changes for Advancement and Security. Finally, the result is showing me that my dominant is situated at Balance. This is the truth of me.

If there is a chance, I wish to share this “Talent Development” with you, my friends.

空中堵塞

周五，清晨四点起身，洗澡准备一切后，五点向机场出发，趁搭最早的一班机到吉隆坡参加员工会议。一下机就赶去趁搭KLIA快铁，然后又转搭德士到公司。会议一完毕就跟同事一起吃午餐，之后进行对话。因为要赶下午4点班机，我先离席。

回程也是匆匆忙忙，趁搭地铁，然后趁搭KLIA快铁，要坐半小时路程才到机场。等了一个钟头，终于可以登机，坐在那又满座又闷热的飞机里半个小时，喝了冻水也顶不住，连空少和空姐也不耐烦了。因为KLIA的系统出了问题，飞机不能起飞。因此大家又被请回到等候厅，在那里又等了半小时，才再次登机。一想到机仓里的闷热就怕了。真的如我想象的在里面又在等待飞机起飞。因为飞机大排长龙，一架接着一架轮流起飞，结果轮到我们的飞机都半个多小时了。即使从窗口望出去，外面下了豪雨，但里面确实闷热到令人想吐。

总算起飞了，那冷空调起了作用，人也平静了下来。也许太累，不知不觉的睡了。等我张开眼时已到了槟岛上空，真令人兴奋，那里知道，飞机还要在上空盘旋，因为同时有多架飞机要上升和降落，所以又得排队了。用了将近半小时才可以安全降落。看一看手表，已是黄昏6点多。转搭德士回家，到家是都快要7点了。

原本一个美好的周五，就这样白白的浪费掉在这无谓的匆匆忙忙、等了又等的来往机场和耐人寻味的空中堵塞里。

newfeeling

A muggy and boring Tuesday night, I read a magazine and served with a cup of cold green tea. I would like to share with you one of the article that impressed me.

This article is writing about a five year old kid had a conversation with his father when they reached the school gate in his first day of school.

The father was carrying the son on his shoulders and he felt the son little hands grip his hair, and the son became very quiet. The son whispered: "Dad, it's all funny in my tummy, and I feel a bit shy." The father asked if the son was afraid. "Nah!" the son said, "I'm not scared, I've just got 'newfeeling'."

Newfeeling! This word the father had made up years earlier and had talked about with the son was helping him cope with the biggest day of change in his young life so far. The son told himself he didn't feel "scared", he just had "newfeeling". Because he knew this was a normal and natural thing to feel.

In this article, the father has the conclusion as the following.

1. Life is change.

2. When you refuse to change, you don’t hold onto the past: you lose the future.

3. Tell yourself is a “newfeeling” when you encounter something challenged and nervous or even scared.

Referring to this article is reminding me one of the Ikeda sensei’s guidance as the following.

“One of my favorite Argentine poets, the great educator Almafuerte (1854-1917) wrote: "To the weak, difficulty is a closed door. To the strong, however, it is a door waiting to be opened." Difficulties impede the progress of those who are weak. For the strong, however, they are opportunities to open wide the doors to a bright future. Everything is determined by our attitude, by our resolve. Our heart is what matters most.”

电影感想

刚过去的周末，看了两部电影，一部是来自东欧，另一部是属于东亚国家的。看完这两部电影后，让我有点震撼。虽说是一部电影，但戏如人生，也是现实的写照。

第一部是说出了为得到周围的祝福，为爱坚持到底，要取得到完美的结果，就要承受排山倒海的压力，经历坎坷困难的过程。当然故事的结局是皆大欢喜。也许这些结局只会在电影里出现，回到现实生活不易见到。但我不否认这实事的存在，遗憾的是至今我还未曾遇见过。观察周围的环境，体会身边的朋友，实事还是残酷的。

要顾及父母的尊严，还是要尊敬孩子的决定？保住父母的尊严，就要牺牲孩子的选择。让孩子两者选一，也是一件残忍之事。试想一个是有养育之恩的父母，一个是陪伴终老的爱人。选择父母，就得失去心中所爱，留下人，但心已不在。相反的，选择爱人，就要终生背负着大逆不道、忘恩负义的罪名。两者都是背叛之罪，爱一个人是多么的无奈。

相同的，要是父母坚持以威严压迫之下，逼虎跳墙，难免孩子会选择离开，这样身为父母的就得承受痛失孩子之痛。也因为父母出自于疼爱孩子心切，通常父母都会依自己的意愿，人生经验而替孩子自作主张，布置一切。这样不只解决不了问题，反而是弄巧反拙，将事情变本加厉、复杂化。如果严重一点，也许会导致孩子两者都放弃，那么就呜呼哀哉，也许会白白断送一条人命，或许让孩子永远承受着精神煎熬，终身遗憾，留给孩子挥之不去的阴影。

试想看，要是一对真心相爱的恋人，如果得不到身边至亲的祝福是多么的残忍。不管生活上是多么的幸福美满，不能与至亲分享这份喜悦是多么的美中不足。如戏里的父母，最后能秉持着开明的态度，试着了解，聆听孩子的心声。然后勇于接受、尊敬和支持孩子的决定。身为孩子的也一样能体会到父母所付出的一切。这会使到孩子更懂得珍惜，加深了孩子对父母的感恩和尊重。父母要的是确保孩子未来的幸福、快乐。而孩子也能为自己的决定而负责任。父母和孩子都能达成双赢的局面，何乐而不为呢？或许瞎说容易而实不易为。但这是实事，无可否认。

而第二部一开始就描述着两个青春貌美的好朋友，持着各自的理想寻爱而去，创造各自完美的爱情故事。然而人到中年后，一切都起了变化。接着故事就叙述他们中年后的状况。

原本一对恩爱至老的情侣，因其中一个爱侣先逝世，而留下自己一个人，孤独终老。杀时间感到彷徨无助，过去习惯有爱侣在身边，现在得独自过活，仿佛失去了一只翅膀的鸟儿，再也不能翱翔，失落感导致最后患上了老人痴呆症。

另一个因患上绝症后，经不起药物的折磨，而自暴自弃，也因这样造就爱侣有了外遇。病痛的煎熬，又自觉失去了以往花样年华的魅力，在这样心灰意冷的情况之下，选择了回乡待毙。因此再次让一对好朋友重逢。

一个抱着等待死神的迎接，一个持着久别重逢的喜悦，两人虽然相见欢，但却是不一样的心情。即将离逝的朋友就对好朋友千依百顺，而患上老人痴呆症的朋友就误把好朋友当做是逝世的爱侣。好朋友之间因此互相扶持、相依为命。故事就到此结束。

不管过去是如何的青春活力，那么的美丽动人，还是国色天香，但随着岁月的流逝，谁都逃不过生老病死的阶段。人始终还是要面对这实事残酷的挑战。至于要经营一段至死不渝的爱情，谈何容易，这是要经得起岁月的考验，历经一些荆棘途径，很多时候在几许风雨之后，会选择半途放弃，也许这是缺乏耐心所致。

一对恋人，通常先离逝的那一个会是最幸福的，因为不必受牵挂之苦、思念的煎熬。不过留下的那一个会是最坚强的，因为了爱侣而努力、勇敢的继续活下去。生命本无常，由不得你我去控制，既然如此，当两个人能有共识的在一起时，不管它是短暂还是长久，就要好好地珍惜这段爱情。这就是所谓的掌握自己的幸福，切记不要把遗憾留给自己。

整容前后

女黑侠的整容前后照。。。

整容前。

整容后。

车祸日记

4月30日，星期五，中午1时，艳阳高照，上班的路途上，马路到处都是车水马龙，一辆银色KXX XXXX的Waja驾在我的前面，停停走走，为了安全起见，我将女黑侠跟它保持一段距离。来到Light Street，刚好在州议厅前，这辆Waja杀时杀车，我唯有跟随它杀车。习惯性的杀车后，都会向倒退镜望，这时我望见一辆车身比女黑侠高大的不停驶前进，而司机好像还未留意到，这已是我的控制范围外，心里感到不妙，我猛踩着杀车，听天由命，一声巨响“砰”，那辆车侵犯了女黑侠。我道出了一声“Shit!”我就赶快下车看，被一辆像是Kembala/CRV/Pajero车牌是PEX 75XX的车撞上。女黑侠的后保险杠被撞到有点弯曲，左下的后退感应器断裂。不幸的大幸是没有什么大伤，如果没故意去观察，不是很显眼。但女黑侠在马路上奔驰才八个月多而已，所以我要司机负责任。

一下车我就带着很糟糕的心情，不耐烦的面色，对着司机说：“为什么如此大意？” 司机忙着说：“请冷静！我会负责任。现在我忙着要载孩子放学，还要赶去医院探望人。请不要报案。”我回答道：“我不理你什么原因，你要把车子修理好。”“我会的， 你下午3时才打给我。” 司机接着说，然后他就给了我他的手机号码，我试打给他，他收到了。我为了不要让交通堵塞，取了号码和抄了车牌就驾驶开了，这时我才想起望了要他的身份证号码。他也很快的把车驾开。

下午3时，我赶快将车子驾去给住在我工作附近的友人看，友人是汽车电漆槌车中心的老板，通常我们称友人为“汽车美容师”。幸好这天友人有事，所以在劳动节前休假一天。友人看了之后告诉我修理费会是少过RM300。这样起码我可以跟司机讨价还价。

下午4时，我打电话给司机，对方所现在很忙，还在医院里，要我傍晚6时打给他。我尽人情，我答应了。

傍晚8时，我打电话给司机，他说他还在医院里很忙，要求我晚上10时至11时之间才打给他。我再次尽人情答应了。

晚上10时，我打电话给另一位友人，要求他倍我去跟司机讨价还价，我一五一十的告诉友人，这时友人说有点不妥，要我跟司机要个明确的时间和地点解决问题。友人劝说我不可以如此仁慈，要加重语气对待他了。

晚上10时半，我打电话给司机，这时司机就恶人先告状，说我一直不停的打点话给他。我有了先前的准备，这时的我火发一不可收拾，不只加重语气，还一轮嘴的狂骂他不遵守他的诺言。也许对方招架不住，终于订下明早上10时在Sungai Dua的KFC那里见面。之后，我跟友人说，我讨厌骂架，好多年没有如此动气，他真逼我上梁山。

5月1日，星期六，早上10时，我与内行的友人陪伴下准时到达地点。友人说：“我看他不会准时出现，也许还要等到11时。”我接着就打电话给司机，从电话里他的声音，应该是刚睡醒。结果45分钟后他才出现。他就引路我们到他的修理汽车中心。他的“汽车美容师”看了之后，就跟他说修理费为RM230。要他付钱了才帮我的女黑侠美容。原本我打算立刻解决，但“美容师”告诉我这个周末已满。要我星期一来，我因担心没有车上班，很不方便。原本想要预约下个星期六，但那司机说要把车拿来了才付钱。因此修理汽车中心的老板即刻劝告我星期一就把车拿来修理。我也认同他的意见。司机也答应他会在星期一付钱。

5月3日，星期一，早上9时半，我就把车驾去修理汽车中心。幸好另一为友人星期一是他的补假，他真的帮了我很大的忙，从中心载我去上班，然后又答应帮我在傍晚取车。真麻烦了他！大约黄昏5时多我打电话给修理汽车中心的老板，跟进女黒侠的留医进度。修理汽车中心的老板说：“真不好意思！我已帮你买了修理的东西，但因为司机还未付钱，所以我不能帮你弄。还有那司机要你分担一半的修理费。我打电话给他的时候，他还说他现在人不在Penang去了KL，但明明我刚才在路口看到他。真是‘Kek Leng Ga Teh!’”我很心平气和的回答说：“不要紧！让我跟他说。等会儿我才打电话给你。”因为此时我还在上班，我就走去一个没有人的角落打电话给司机，对方一接电话，我就豪不留情的泼妇骂街般清洗他一场，只差那些污言恶语未出而已。我三番四次忍让，他却选择挑战我的容忍界线，超越的结果就是如此的下场。

被我臭骂一顿后，他突然现身在修理汽车中心，跟修理汽车中心的老板承诺将在星期三付钱。这些都是之后修理汽车中心的老板和友人转告给我知道的现场状况。修理汽车中心的老板说：“刚才说人在KL，现在出现了。。。你暂时不要去报案。”因为我在电话理警告司机，我将要到交通警察局报案，我还会以高价要他的保险费，废掉他的NCD，即使我被罚款我也不会放过他。我还打算以欺骗、试拖延我错过报案的罪行告他。

5月5日，星期三，早上10时半，我再次打电话给修理汽车中心的老板，老板告诉我，司机答应将在中午2时多来付钱。一旦司机付钱就会通知我。心情还是战战兢兢的，担心司机再次出尔反尔。打算如果司机一担没有实行他的诺言，我就会采取法律途径对付他，我已给了他太多机会了。

中午3时多，修理汽车中心的老板打电话给我，告诉我，司机终于付钱了。我可以随时驾车去修理。老板跟我说：“我跟他说你的汽车已修理好，你也取车了。要他现在来付钱。我真的讲到没有口水。如果他打电话过来就这样回答。”我就听从老板的说法，同时也向老板道谢。

5月6日，星期四，早上9时多，很感谢友人百忙中还帮了我很大的忙。载我去上班，然后又将车子送去修理。傍晚6时多，友人还帮我去取车。也感谢同事等我下班载我回家。这一场突发车祸，拖拖拉拉了一个星期，使到大家都身心劳累，总算可以画上句号。

借此我要向所有在我须要帮助时，伸出暖手的友人们说声：“很感谢你们的意见、问候和帮忙。谢谢你们！”